[ it's a strange feeling, to have no awareness of another time where she has touched him just like this, but to know that this isn't the first. to brush her fingertips along his brow, his cheek, his hair, and to know she's felt it before. they have been this close before, and her body seems to know the proximity better than she ever could, but there is also a strange sort of...lack. nothing lacking, necessarily, but a distinct notice that - perhaps before - there had been much more in her chest. there had been more going on.
right now, yennefer does not mind the simplicity. in fact, part of her wonders if this is something she has looked for. yearned for. and yet still, even now, it feels as though it will not last.
he blinks at her, but she knows it is not in confusion. knows that somewhere, back behind those golden eyes, he knows what she means to ask. it's a strange sort of feeling, to know that he knows. to be seen and understood more fully by the person looking at her than she does herself. but between julian and ciri, and now him, yennefer sees no reason to push back against it. or, maybe, it is just because of him. just because this moment, with him looking up to her, with that crooked smile, a breath out through his nose - this is not something she would soon forget, memories or no. perhaps she never did.
yennefer smiles back to him, still quite soft around the edges, as her finger traces across his brow, down the arch of his nose. her eyes follow her fingers, follow the stretch of skin she runs across, trying to re-memorize something she is so sure he already knows. ]
Second guess yourself, when you have something nice. [ there is more she could say here, perhaps. about how she is referring to how much he obviously wishes to sleep. how, even earlier, when he'd looked at her and said no. perhaps her words could be taken to mean more, about this, about them, but that's not exactly what she means, either.
yennefer pulls her fingers from him, then, though with some reluctance. she shifts her body, too, to lay back into the spot she had been in. to set her cheek down against the pillow and to look at him without much expectation. she is curious, yes, but she is curious because it is him. and maybe the truth is that she is curious because she doesn't know. maybe all of these things she has been feeling are merely figments of her imagination. maybe they aren't because the man who lays across from her is her's, in any way at all.
but she wishes he was. hopes he is. wonders, briefly, who the woman is that he wants her to be. which is why, with her next words, there is a sort of tilt to them. fondness, but something more. distance, perhaps. she smiles again, though it is a bit heavier. ] You should be allowed something good, every now and then.
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right now, yennefer does not mind the simplicity. in fact, part of her wonders if this is something she has looked for. yearned for. and yet still, even now, it feels as though it will not last.
he blinks at her, but she knows it is not in confusion. knows that somewhere, back behind those golden eyes, he knows what she means to ask. it's a strange sort of feeling, to know that he knows. to be seen and understood more fully by the person looking at her than she does herself. but between julian and ciri, and now him, yennefer sees no reason to push back against it. or, maybe, it is just because of him. just because this moment, with him looking up to her, with that crooked smile, a breath out through his nose - this is not something she would soon forget, memories or no. perhaps she never did.
yennefer smiles back to him, still quite soft around the edges, as her finger traces across his brow, down the arch of his nose. her eyes follow her fingers, follow the stretch of skin she runs across, trying to re-memorize something she is so sure he already knows. ]
Second guess yourself, when you have something nice. [ there is more she could say here, perhaps. about how she is referring to how much he obviously wishes to sleep. how, even earlier, when he'd looked at her and said no. perhaps her words could be taken to mean more, about this, about them, but that's not exactly what she means, either.
yennefer pulls her fingers from him, then, though with some reluctance. she shifts her body, too, to lay back into the spot she had been in. to set her cheek down against the pillow and to look at him without much expectation. she is curious, yes, but she is curious because it is him. and maybe the truth is that she is curious because she doesn't know. maybe all of these things she has been feeling are merely figments of her imagination. maybe they aren't because the man who lays across from her is her's, in any way at all.
but she wishes he was. hopes he is. wonders, briefly, who the woman is that he wants her to be. which is why, with her next words, there is a sort of tilt to them. fondness, but something more. distance, perhaps. she smiles again, though it is a bit heavier. ] You should be allowed something good, every now and then.