Estinien stands, not because he's planning on leaving, but because he's no longer in a sitting kind of mood. There's no surprise on his face when Geralt tells him to fuck off, so maybe him not understanding isn't the problem. He understands Geralt wants him to shut up and leave. The question is whether he cares to or not.
"I understand full well," he growls, glaring at the man with a look that approaches contempt. "What I don't see is why, given your own policy of caring 'fuck all', that I should be all that concerned with what brings you comfort."
He doesn't see it as a mercy to be allowed to go ignored. He doesn't want offers to look the other way or let this one slide. He didn't come here to apologize. No, what he wants is for Geralt to look at him and to address the trouble on his doorstep without shrinking away like a coward. He didn't ask for mercy, what he asked for was understanding, and it's clear that neither of them are getting that here.
It's with a tenderness that he withdraws his attempt at empathy. Despite how far he's come, it's what it so often comes down to when he feels hurt. Eye for an eye. If he will not be heard, he will not listen, either. He may see the value in self-sacrifice, but it will not be done on account of someone who offers nothing in return.
It's comforting, to recoil into himself like this, to feel justified bearing his fangs. He tried to be like the other Scions. No one can say he didn't try.
"I had hoped to spare us both unnecessary pains, but I can see now 'twas for naught. Remember this well. When you lose what little you have in this place, remember: 'twas your own indolence that prevented you from doing a single thing to stop it."
no subject
"I understand full well," he growls, glaring at the man with a look that approaches contempt. "What I don't see is why, given your own policy of caring 'fuck all', that I should be all that concerned with what brings you comfort."
He doesn't see it as a mercy to be allowed to go ignored. He doesn't want offers to look the other way or let this one slide. He didn't come here to apologize. No, what he wants is for Geralt to look at him and to address the trouble on his doorstep without shrinking away like a coward. He didn't ask for mercy, what he asked for was understanding, and it's clear that neither of them are getting that here.
It's with a tenderness that he withdraws his attempt at empathy. Despite how far he's come, it's what it so often comes down to when he feels hurt. Eye for an eye. If he will not be heard, he will not listen, either. He may see the value in self-sacrifice, but it will not be done on account of someone who offers nothing in return.
It's comforting, to recoil into himself like this, to feel justified bearing his fangs. He tried to be like the other Scions. No one can say he didn't try.
"I had hoped to spare us both unnecessary pains, but I can see now 'twas for naught. Remember this well. When you lose what little you have in this place, remember: 'twas your own indolence that prevented you from doing a single thing to stop it."